How to Manage Your Anger, Make It Work for You and Get Ahead

How to Manage Your Anger, Make It Work for You and Get Ahead

Negative feelings are there for a reason but when they spiral out of control, you need a break.

Anger: it’s something we all experience. And it’s not always bad. Feeling a bit upset over something can be good: it can motivate you to change, and push you to achieve more. Maybe you failed your driving test, or you didn’t get the job you really wanted. Feeling peeved about it can help you look at your skills rationally, and work out what you need to improve upon, in order to achieve better success next time.

But when anger builds up, too much of it is a problem. It’s not good for others around you to experience you expressing it. And moreover, it’s not beneficial for you, neither emotionally nor physically.

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But here’s a fact: anger is here to stay. We have evolved to feel it as an emotion and it isn’t going away anytime soon. So, how can you deal with it in a constructive way to create a quality life?

A good first step to take is to be honest with yourself. Do your friends and family consider you to be a short fuse? Are you known for your temper? Be factual- it’s not a positive or negative thing. Don’t be ashamed if the answer is ‘yes’ as you can’t help the way you’re wired.

If you ARE explosive in nature, acknowledge it and know that you can take charge of it.

What to do? The experts offer numerous approaches.


Try to see the ridiculous side of your situation. It can lighten your mood. Using humor to make light of whatever is pushing your buttons big time can help to ease your tension.

It can also be a good idea to talk to yourself: tell yourself to ‘take it easy’ and ‘relax’, the same way you would when talking to another person.

And remember that it can be a good idea to release yourself from whatever is causing you to feel angry.

Take a time-out, (yes, they aren’t just for kids). If you feel like you’re about to boil over, walk away from the situation. Take the time you need to level your inner chemistry and get back to being your good self.

When you do so, reward yourself for a good decision, whether it be with a new piece of clothing, a sweet treat or something else you enjoy.

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Finally, professionals suggest that you practice forgiveness. Forgiving someone who has wronged you or simply forgiving yourself will take a huge load off your shoulders.

We all make mistakes and we can simply become stronger for them. When you carry anger with you, it can take over your character.

Remember: you have a positive person inside. If you feel that you need professional help, reach out and talk to your doctor or a counselor who can point you to a mental health professional. You’ll be glad you did.

It’s always beneficial to avoid regrets and to be able to move forward in life. For tips on experiencing all of your emotions, both the good and the bad, click here.

Photo credits: Sayan Puangkham/

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